Self-care isn’t all about hydrating face masks, binge-watching your favorite series, spending time for zzzs, and meditation. It also involves giving the intimate parts of your body their well-deserved love and attention, such as getting a yoni massage.
For this guide, we will be discussing the ins and outs of a yoni massage. We will talk about the benefits, the basic techniques, and some massage essentials. Let’s get started!
What is a Yoni Massage?
A Yoni Massage is a form of tantric massage that stimulates a woman’s genital area. Unlike masturbation, the end goal of this message isn’t to orgasm but to make people discover and embrace their sensual side.
It’s also different from masturbation in terms of duration, as most self-pleasure sessions end in 5-20 minutes. On the other hand, a yoni massage takes 60-90 minutes, depending on the receiver and the masseur.
As for the origin of the term, the word “Yoni” is the Sanskrit for vulva and is loosely translated as a “sacred cave” or “sacred portal.” It’s also the symbol of the goddess Shakti, which is the feminine generative power in Hinduism.
Benefits of Getting Yoni Massages
You’re probably wondering how 60-90 minutes of vulva massaging can improve one’s sexual wellness. Well, aside from bringing pleasure and relief, there are mental and physical health benefits that you could get from a yoni massage.
1It makes you more connected with your body.
One of the key benefits of this massage is that it helps you become more in-tune with your body. It helps you unblock channels that stop you from tapping that sensual side. Whether you’re sexually repressed or thinking that there’s something wrong with your body, having a yoni massage can take you to a sense of tranquility and let you discover sensations that you may have never experienced down there.
2It can awaken a “sleeping” vagina.
Did you know that having unsatisfactory sexual experiences can dampen a woman’s sexual drive? If they are experiencing pain and stress during the deed, their bodies tend to get tensed up; it’s a coping mechanism against the uncomfortable sensations they’ve felt during sex. Along with a tensed-up body, they may also experience vaginal dryness and low libido, putting their intimate area and sexual urges into “sleeping” mode.
This is why engaging in a yoni massage has been recommended for women with sexual trauma or unpleasant sexual experience. It helps you reignite that sexual spark as you go through the soft and gentle massaging motions from your own or your partner’s hands. It helps you let go of the negative thoughts and memories that you’ve had from previous experiences. With regular massage sessions, you’ll soon find yourself craving for those sensual touches again.
3It can lessen vaginal tension and pain.
Yoni massages are a great way to alleviate pain in the intimate area. Experience period cramps? You can try doing this massage to stimulate the blood flow and help you relax your vagina throughout the menstrual cycle. Experiencing pain during penetrative sex? Receiving a yoni massage can help you “awaken” the vagina, making it more relaxed and excited for what’s about to come.
Also, if you end up orgasming during or after the session, expect the feel-good hormones, such as endorphins, to ease up the pain you’re feeling on the other parts of your body.
4It can help you reach better orgasms.
Aside from relieving body pain and unlocking your sexual self, this tantric practice promises stronger and longer-lasting orgasms. This is because a yoni massage, especially if you’re doing it yourself, helps you have a deep understanding of how you want to touch and pleasure your body. Massaging your intimate area also releases the tension on your body, making it more receptive to sexual stimulation.
5It can boost your self-esteem.
By completely understanding your sensual side and how your body works, you’ll get to be more confident in bed. Since the negative thoughts are now released and blocked from your mind, you’ll become more active in the deed and more engaging with your partner during sex or with yourself during a solo play.
How to Perform a Yoni Massage
As you’ve learned the different benefits of yoni massage, we hope you’ll give it a shot. It may take longer than your usual self-pleasure plays, but trust us, it’ll make you fall in love with your body and sensuality even more. Now, if you’re saying yes to yoni and planning to give yourself or your female partner this massage, here are the basic steps that you should take.
1Set the scene and prepare the essentials.
Preparing for a yoni massage is similar to preparing for a regular massage, with minor tweaks.
First, you’ll need to prep your room to give it a “spa vibe.” Having a dim room with aromatherapy candles around is a great way to relax your body and warm it up. You can also put on some white noise or spa music to amp up the vibe.
Second, you’ll need to prepare your body. Take a warm shower or bubble bath. If you’re doing this with/to your partner, we recommend doing this step together. Not only it keeps you spotless clean, but the warm water will also relax you. Aside from showering, make sure to cut and file your nails. Remember, you’ll be using your hands for this, so having long fingernails can cause mishaps, such as minor cuts on the skin. If you can’t cut your long fingernails, just wear latex gloves.
Next, place everything you need in the massage session within arm’s reach, such as some extra towels, tissues, wet wipes, massage oil, and personal lubricant. This will keep you in the zone and not fumble around when you need to reapply lube or get additional towels.
Lastly, you’ll need to remove any possible distractions. Remember, you’re gonna do this for more than an hour, so make sure your responsibilities are finished before the massage. Keep the room locked and put your devices in airplane mode so no one can disturb you during the session.
2Begin with breathwork.
Once you’re done with preparations, sit down on your bed, close your eyes, and start doing the basic deep breathing exercise; nothing too fancy, just deep inhales and exhales through your nose; it’s up to you how long you’ll hold on to your breath, just make sure you’re doing it rhythmically. Do this for at least a minute.
By starting the session with breathwork, it’ll help ease up the tension and remove distracting thoughts. Here are some of the basic breathwork exercises that you can try:
For this exercise, you’ll breathe through your nose. Take a long and deep inhale, lightly constricting the back of your throat. Wait for a few seconds, then release it through your nose. If done correctly, you may hear a whispering sound when exhaling. Repeat the process until you’re ready for the next activity.
For this technique, start by putting your dominant hand on your thighs and your non-dominant hand on your chest. Then, slowly exhale through your mouth to get all the oxygen out of your lungs. After that, inhale slowly and deeply through your nose to count to four. Feel the refreshing air entering your lungs.
You will then hold your breath for four seconds and slowly exhale it through your mouth for four seconds. Repeat the process until you’re ready for the next activity. PS. If you have severe breathing issues that don’t allow you to hold your breath for a certain amount of time, consult your healthcare provider first before trying this.
For this breathwork exercise, you’ll need to quickly inhale and exhale through your nose. While having hyperventilation-like breathing, pump your belly back and forth in rhythm with your breathing. The rapid, shallow inhales and exhales can send your body into an arousing state.
3Spread the energy with a light body massage.
After doing breathwork for a few minutes, just stay still and do basic deep breathing exercises again as a way to ground your body and remove any mental distractions. Feel the energy inside your naked body and listen to your breathing.
Once you’re done with grounding yourself or your partner, you can now proceed with light massages. Grab your massage oil, pour some of it into your hands, and start massaging your own or your partner’s body, except the genitals. You don’t need to have a specific massage technique for this method; just make sure you’re keeping a consistent pace. Just keep on massaging your body until you feel your genitals being in a heated frenzy.
4Massage the genitals with yoni massage techniques.
Are you feeling a pleasurable burning sensation down there and can no longer hold it in? Grab some tissues or wet wipes to remove the massage oil in your palms. Spread your own or your partner’s legs wide and gently place your fingers right in your vulva. You can now start performing yoni massage techniques to your own or your partner’s intimate area.
For beginners, we recommend starting with the clit tapping technique, wherein you tap the clitoris and varying rhythms and see what pace your body responds to the most.
As for the speed and pressure of the massage, go slow and gentle with the motions, then gradually move to quicker and deeper strokes. You can also try different yoni massaging techniques to amp it up; check the next section for more details.
5Reach the energy release and relax.
Keep on performing the yoni massage until you reach a sweet and relieving release. You don’t have to orgasm nor squirt; as long as you’ve felt an energy release in your body, then you’ve successfully finished the massage.
After reaching the energy release or climaxing, let yourself or your partner rest and feel the glowing effects of the massage. You or your partner may also feel extra sensitive to touch during this period, so it’s better to just leave the receiver in a peaceful state.
Yoni Massage Techniques
Trying out the yoni massage for yourself or your partner? Here are the basic yoni massage techniques that you should try in your next session. Just mix and match the methods until you find the techniques that work on your own or your partner’s body.
1The Clit Tap
For this technique, tap the clitoris at varying speeds and pressure. This is perfect for beginners who are looking for non-complicated massage methods.
For this technique, you will be making circling motions right at the tip of your clitoral nub. Place your lubed-up index or middle finger on the tip of the clit, then make circular motions on it. Mix it up by making smaller and bigger circles, as well as alternating the pressure.
3Clit ‘O Clock
For this method, you will be making small circular motions on the flesh that surrounds the clitoris. Just pretend that your clit is the center of a clock, then make small circles on the side of the clit, stopping at every point/location of each hour.
This yoni massage technique is pretty similar to the Clit Tap, but instead of tapping the clitoral nub, you’re giving rapid and shallow taps on it, as if your finger is vibrating. Though this method is easy, your hands and fingers may get easily tired due to the swift motion.
5Tug & Roll
This method may be overwhelming for newbies since it involves light pinching on the clitoris, so take it easy on this one. Using the fingers on your left and right hand, press it on either side of the clitoris and tug it back and forth as if you’re trying to split your clit into two. You can also tug the sides of the vaginal lips.
After making the tugging motion, hold the clitoris with your thumb and index finger, then roll them between your fingers. This may be a weird reference to point out, but remember the scene in Spongebob Squarepants wherein Mr. Krabs would use a tiny violin? The rolling motion is pretty similar to that.
6Pet the Vulva
This is another yoni massage technique that would be perfect to start a session with. Using your well-lubed index or middle finger, place your finger on the top of the vulva, then slowly move it towards your perineum; this method is basically a long and slow stroke.
7Labia Majora Massage
Place your thumb and index finger on the left side of your outer vaginal lips. Just gently give it a massage; it’s up to you if you want it to side by side or circular motions. After that, place your fingers on the right side of the outer vaginal lips and repeat the massage.
8Labia Minora Massage
This is similar to the previous technique, but instead of the outer lips, you’re massaging the inner vaginal lips. Place your thumb and index finger on the left side of your labia minora and give it a gentle massage for a few minutes. After that, place your fingers on the right side and do the same massage.
9Around The Vulva
For this yoni massage method, you will trace your vulva with your finger. Start by using your non-dominant hand to gently pull the pubic mound up toward the belly, opening the vulva in the process.
Use your index or middle finger in your dominant hand and trace a circle, starting from your clitoris, to the left outer vaginal lips, to your perineum, then to the right side of your outer vaginal lips, then back to the clitoris. After that, do the same massage technique, but instead of tracing the outer vaginal lips, you’re touching the inner vaginal lips. Repeat until you’re finished or ready for the next massage technique.
Insert your middle finger in your vagina. Once it’s fully inside, don’t move the finger or do other techniques. Just keep it in for a few minutes and feel your finger in there. We recommend mixing this technique with some breathing exercises.
For this method, you’ll insert your middle finger in your vagina, palms up. Just push it in about 2-3 inches deep or until you feel a spongy surface on the upper vaginal wall. Once you’ve got that textured spot, start tapping it as if you’re pressing a doorbell.
Insert 1-2 fingers in your vagina, palms up. Press or rub the upper vaginal wall. After that, turn your hand (90 degrees clockwise) and bring the palm to the right side of the vaginal wall. Press and rub the right side of the vaginal wall for a few seconds. After that, rotate your hand again (90 degrees clockwise) to bring the palm to the bottom side of your vaginal wall. Make the same motions as you’ve done with the other sides. Next, turn your hand again (90 degrees clockwise) and rub the left side of your vaginal wall.
Keep repeating the rotation until you’re done with the session or when you’re ready for the next massaging method.
13Massaging The G-Spot
This yoni massage technique is pretty similar to what you would do when stimulating your own or your partner’s g-spot during masturbation or sex. The only twist is that you’re not going to do it for the orgasm, but to give your g-spot the tender loving care that it deserves. This means no intense rubbing just to reach an orgasm— just delicate rubs in varying speed and depth.
Start by inserting your well-lubed middle finger in your vagina, palms up. Just push 2-3 inches your upper vaginal wall or until you locate that spongy spot. Once you’ve found the g-spot, you can make circular, up-and-down, or come hither motions with it. Experiment with different finger motions, pressure, and speed to keep things exciting.
Looking for a hands-free technique? Here you go. For this method, you’ll only need to tighten your pelvic floor, like you would do when holding your pee, hold it in for 3-5 seconds, then release the muscles. Count 3-5 seconds, then repeat the process. Do this 5-10 times.
If you want to use some sexual wellness tools to amp up this technique, go for Kegel or Ben Wa Ball(s). It’s a weighted silicone ball(s) that you’ll insert in your vagina. It’s meant to be worn while you’re doing kegel exercises. For more information about the kegel exercises, we highly suggest checking this article.
If you’re looking for a yoni massage technique that doesn’t involve the vulva, make sure to try this one. All you need to do is to slap your inner thighs as if you’re drumming. Experiment with different speeds and depths until you figure out your preferences.
Yoni Massage Essentials
Now that you’ve learned the ins and outs of this tantric practice, we can sense your excitement to do it! But before you close this guide and try it yourself, check out some of the love toys and intimate products that you’ll need for your yoni massage sessions.
Frequently Asked Questions
As you reach the end of this guide, you’re already equipped with basic details about the yoni massage. But if there are still questions lingering in your mind, we’ve answered some of the frequently asked questions below. Check and see if we’ve included your inquiry!
1Is yoni massage safe?
Yes! The massage techniques are mostly on your vulva area and don’t require strenuous penetration. As long as your hands are clean, you’re using water-based lube, and your fingernails are short and smooth, you’ll do fine.
2What’s the difference between fingering and yoni massage?
It’s about the intent of the activity. Fingering or female masturbation is usually done to feel pleasurable sensations and reach orgasm as soon as possible. On the other hand, a yoni massage relaxes your vulva and vagina and helps you unleash your sensual side. It tries to remove emotional or mental blockages that stop you from enjoying pleasure.
Another difference is the duration. Female masturbation is usually done 5-20 minutes, while the yoni massage is done 60 minutes or longer.
3Do I need to use the Yoni Egg when doing a yoni massage?
Nope! In fact, using a Yoni Egg is not recommended by medical professionals. Experts claim that it’s dangerous to use the “yoni massage tool” as the materials used for the egg are semi-porous. Inserting it in the vagina can pose a lot of health risks, including a bacterial infection.
Now, if you still want to incorporate a tool to amp up your yoni massages, we highly suggest using Kegel or Ben Wa Balls instead. Unlike the Yoni Egg, this lifestyle device is made with body-safe and non-porous materials.
4Can women who never experienced vaginal penetration try this massage?
Yes, inexperienced women to vaginal sex can safely engage in this activity. Most of the yoni massage methods are done externally, so if you’re uncomfortable with inserting your finger down there, you can skip those vaginal stimulation techniques and focus on the vulva-massaging ones instead.
5Can I get a yoni massage from a professional masseur/masseuse?
Nope! Sensual massage parlors are prohibited under existing laws in the Philippines, as yoni massage is seen as “extra service” or a form of prostitution hiding in the guise of a regular massage. The only way you can legally avail a professional yoni massage is by flying out of the country and getting a booking there.
This is why we highly recommend learning this on your own and trying it yourself. You can also ask your partner to perform it on you. Beware of shady local “sensual massage parlors” as these businesses are illegal, and booking them may only cause mishaps.
Engaging in a yoni massage promises a tantric experience that’ll ignite your sexual appetite; it’s a great step toward discovering your sexual power. It may be similar to female masturbation, but the pacing and intent are different from self-pleasure.
For more sex and self-love guides, click here for more articles. You may also inquire about sensual massages through our Dr. Sex; just answer the form here, and she’ll be glad to help you out. Good luck!