Shallowing 101: Taking Just The Tip To The Max!

If you’re not in the mood for deep penetration with your boo or by yourself, perhaps shallowing can be a better option at the moment. If you’ve never heard of it, then this is your sex education class for the day! Because perhaps, taking the shallow route may not be such a bad idea, especially in sex.

Unlock the teasing ropes of shallowing through this guide down below, from the reasons why people are into it, the different techniques on how to pull it off, and many more. Happy reading! 

What is Shallowing?

The Everygirl defines shallowing as “a penetration technique that focuses all the attention on the opening and first few centimeters (up to an inch) of the vagina.” 

When a heterosexual couple engages in vaginal penetration, there’s a chance they’ve done shallowing without them even noticing. Maybe as a way to tease and put themselves on the edge before getting down and dirty. Regardless, this teasing front act can already be a main act on its own. 

Plus, if you think about it, shallow is literally the opposite of deep. Hence, this type of penetration only sticks to pleasing what’s near or on the surface.

Aside from vaginal shallowing, oral, anal, and finger shallowing also exist wherein the required parts (e.g., tongue, penis, and fingers) only stimulate the opening part. 

Reasons Why People Like Shallowing

Browse through the various reasons as to why some people are into this kind of sexual activity.

1 It elicits so much anticipation.

This perk is especially true when shallowing serves as foreplay. You literally have just the tip right there, teasing and playing around with your own sensitive genitals. Though the same effect also goes if it’s the main act. You’d do anything to push or have it be pushed it inside, but no. That is not the point, which makes things sooooo much hotter!

2 It changes up their usual sex routine.

Sure, deep penetration is hot. The usual default, but only having the penis a few inches in, brings out different sensations and even mindset shifts you wouldn’t expect. And mostly on the beneficial side because practicing novelty in sex encourages self-discovery, whether or not you’re into it.

3 There’s so much pleasure!

Vaginal shallowing stimulates the clitoris and vulva area of a vulva owner, which are their most sensitive areas. Hence, they’d get off more when targeted accurately and correctly. Then for anal shallowing, the backdoor area is sensitive overall, so even going in a bit can elicit so much bliss.

Oral shallowing pays lots of attention to the aforementioned sensitive spots, except when you’re using your mouth. Regardless, giving head this way may provide more insight on just how far you can go to come.

4 It’s inclusive.

Shallowing works for all sorts of couples with varying anatomies. For a vulva owner-vulva owner couple, a strap-on dildo can be substituted as a penis in this activity if that’s what they crave. Even using fingers works just as well.

Anal shallowing also exists for all when you want to take things to the backdoor. Anyone and everyone can participate in shallowing as long as they are consenting partners.

5 You learn so much more about your body.

Sure, you’ve discovered what your body is like during deep penetration, from what angles that make you come quick to the different, internal zones that are easily sensitive. But how about shallowing? How quick or slow does it take for the tip of a penis, finger, tongue, or even sex toy to make you feel good before reaching an o? Do you prefer them to please your vaginal opening more or to insert a little bit in? 

Your genitals hold so many nerve endings even before you get deep into them, so exploring yours and witnessing firsthand the set you’re given empowers you to know your body a whole lot more. 

How to Engage in Solo Shallowing

For those who want to try this sexual activity alone, learn just how, depending on what genitals you have down below.

1 Vulva Owners

If you’re using your fingers, tease your clit first to awaken your vulva area, then rub around your vaginal opening. When craving for more, you can insert said fingers and stimulate yourself. It can be through scissoring, light thrusting,  or stroking techniques.

The same rules apply to sex toys like dildos and vibrators. And while this all happens, you may use your free hand to touch and please other erogenous zones. That can be your breasts, inner thighs, neck, and many more.

2 Penis Owners

The tip of your penis is the equivalent of the clitoris of a vulva owner: hella sensitive upon a slight graze and/or touch! One way to do shallowing here is to shape your hand into a circle and graze all over it rather than fully thrust it inside. Such movements can already make you feel good and pleased. 

How to Engage in Partnered Shallowing

Onto the fun part! Check this section out for a step-by-step breakdown of shallowing.

1. Set the mood of the room. It can be through dimming the lights, playing sultry music, responsibly drinking together, lighting a candle, and many more. It should be personal to both of you. Said room can be the bedroom, bathroom (e.g., shower or bathtub sex), and living room (e.g., on the couch).
2. Warm up with foreplay to set the mood and get further acquainted with each other’s body and language. By this time, you’re both slowly discarding your clothes off each other.
3. Get into position. Some ideal positions for shallowing include missionary, doggy, spooning, cowgirl, and even 69.
4. The giver hovers their partner in the bed or whichever cushioned surface of their choice.
5. The giver can tease the receiver by grazing their penis, strap-on dildo, or sex toy on the body part nearest their source of desire. For oral, it can be their nose or cheek. With anal, it can be their butt cheeks, inner thighs, or lower back. The same parts apply to the vaginal variation, including the lower abdomen and chest.
6. Once you’re both aroused and warm, the giver can circle around your chosen area. Then when it’s not enough, they slide themselves in just a bit.
7. Keep the pace slow and steady until you’re ready to speed things up. Voice out such requests and/or analyze each other’s body language here.
8. After reaching an o’, clean each other up and proceed to do more sexual aftercare.

Extra Tips on Making Shallowing More Pleasurable

Reap more benefits from shallowing through this helpful section here.

1 Communicate with each other.

This tip is so important, even more so to do it first before any other tips down below or our breakdown on partnered shallowing above. 

Communicating with your partner, whether it be about sex or not, puts you both on the same page and lets you address whatever it is that’s on your mind. We don’t do any mind-reading here. In terms of shallowing, you and your partner can talk about how far you want to go with shallowing (just the opening and/or going a few inches inside), where you want to do it, what sex positions you’re down to try, and even safe words if it gets too much. Edging can really make a person wild after all.

Aside from these questions, it’s vital to voice out any other thoughts and concerns you may have about shallowing. That way, you’ll both have a more comfortable and honest experience with it and trust each other more.

2 Get each other’s consent.

This tip on shallowing is in line with the previous one, but it deserves its own spotlight. Consent is the enthusiastic and mutual agreement between partners to do something together. In this case, it’s shallowing, and giving consent to each other means you’re okay with doing it. Giving consent here also looks like 

3 Take your time with it.

It’s tempting to fully slide it in (and “it” can mean anything based on what we discussed above. Especially if you’re so used to taking things deep, it takes a lot of willpower and mental discipline to restrain and stick to the surface and not go crazy with need and desire. Hence, take it slow when you’re learning the ropes of shallowing and keeping things under control.

4 Add sex toys!

Both partners are hands-free during shallowing, so it’s extra exciting to take this vacant opportunity to add some sex toys into the mix! Especially when there are many ways this can unfold. 

One is using a clit sucker on both the clit and nipples (yes, take this hack from us). Another is placing nipple clamps while the giver does shallowing from behind. The giver wearing a cock ring while the receiver does oral shallowing on them is also a hot idea worth trying. Moreover, get creative here! If you already have your own set of sex toys at home, incorporate them while still highlighting shallowing. Use this time to go full out on discovering more about your sexual pleasure.

5 Don’t forget the lube!

Especially if you’re going to do anal shallowing, having lube on standby makes the experience a lot smoother and enjoyable. Plus, there are fewer chances of getting injuries due to skin-on-skin irritation and friction. But aside from anal, using lube for vaginal, oral, and finger shallowing can increase your sensitivity and unlock more fun sensations that weren’t there before.

Takeaway

Shallowing shows that reduced penetration or stimulation in sex can still be enjoyable. Given that its target zones are filled with numerous nerve endings, they get easily sensitive. So rather than doubting at first glance, trying it out for yourself is your best reference. Plus, shallowing actually prolongs pleasure, so things don’t have to end so quickly between you two. 

Moreover, it’s important to communicate your needs, get each other’s consent, and move at a comfortable pace to maximize the experience. With that in mind, we hope you have a blast trying out Shallowing!

For more sex-related guides such as this one, head on over to the Lauvblog here.