Hopeless Romantic 101: 10 Key Signs To Look Out For

Oh, to be a hopeless romantic! The world of romance is your oyster, wherein any sweet scenario out there is something you’d want to recreate and have. But just like everything in this world, you must be careful when navigating this journey.

In this guide, we’ll show exactly what it means to be a hopeless romantic and the common signs to look out for, among many other vital sections. Happy reading!

What is a Hopeless Romantic?

A hopeless romantic is someone who are optimistic and idealistic in all things related to romantic love. They also fantasize about their love story being written by the best authors or the universe itself. Whichever route they think is better. 

They have all these possible outcomes that they want to happen for themselves, like being kissed in the rain, hand-holding during dates, slow dancing under the stars, and more. They can get inspiration and ideas from the media they consume or through their already-taken friends and family. In turn, they become building blocks and standards as to what their ideal love story would want to look like.

Is Being a Hopeless Romantic Good or Bad?

Being a hopeless romantic is a type of persona, not a state of mind. With that in mind, there are certain limits to this.

Ironic enough, hopeless romantics are hopeful people eager to give people a chance before making a decision. And even if they were hurt by other people in the past, it doesn’t stop them from opening their hearts and trying again once they’re ready.

However, this persona can become unhealthy and negative when you have certain unrealistic and unattainable standards. It affects the relationships you enter, which may be one-sided or something you’re never fully satisfied with. In other words, something is lacking and can’t be achieved. When this becomes a loop, you may just be and feel completely hopeless in love.

Signs That You’re a Hopeless Romantic

Browse through this section for a blend of good and not-so-good signs of this persona down below.

1 You have a fairytale-like view of love.

This is usually the first and most obvious sign that you’re a hopeless romantic. Whether you just watched or read something of the romance genre, you’ll find yourself daydreaming about your own story. With bits and pieces of such media with your own creativity, you’d rest your head on your hand and fantasize about your ideal lover and the things that build up your story. 

It could be how they look, where you’d meet, how you’d know they’re the one, the confession, and even getting married and settling down for them. Adding them all up, it becomes your happily ever after.

2 Your outlook on love is positive.

As mentioned earlier, you don’t let any unfortunate relationships in the past close your heart. While you let yourself heal, you’re still optimistic that the person for you is still out there. In return, you’d be able to emotionally attract possible prospects and connect with them.

Alongside this, you’re someone who believes in various romantic notions. Soulmates, twin flames, power couple, love at first sight, fate, destiny, you’re into it! Sure, some people may find it unusual, but hey, it’s your own unique way of viewing love.

3 You fall in love easily.

In fairytales, it’s quick for the main characters to fall in love. The whole “love at first sign” trope is common among them. That can very much apply in real life, wherein things start moving quickly when a hopeless romantic starts seeing and dating someone. You become invested at that same pace, too, picturing all sorts of scenarios with them. As long as you can keep yourself at bay, this sign may work in your favor.

4 You become more inspired by life.

When you’re a hopeless romantic, the way you view your surroundings changes. The small, mundane things light up your day, while the big things amplify the thrill of your life. All for the plot, you may think. In turn, life is never boring and you’re truly tapping into your main character energy.

5 You prioritize romantic love in your goals.

While having other goals and interests that are just as valuable, finding a potential romantic partner is a top priority. In turn, you strategize and make power moves to make it happen. And there’s nothing wrong with that as long as you have other goals in play!

6 You idealize your partner.

When a new relationship blossoms between a hopeless romantic and their partner, they may fully focus on their positive traits. Even more so when said traits complement yours, placing the bar higher on your relationship to work. That promotes pressure and higher expectations, which isn’t something you’d want.

Not just this, it’s also possible that a hopeless romantic would only know their new partner on a surface level and yet still believe they’re the one for them.

But mind you, there’s more than what meets the eye, and while it’s also great to be optimistic, having a clear idea of what your dealbreakers can save you so much time and effort. Before the l-word drops, you’d repel when you observe or see something that doesn’t align with you.

7 You’re easily disappointed by your partners.

As a hopeless romantic, there’s a chance that you put your partners on a pedestal. As you idealize them and their potential, you may forget to actually see them for who they are. Because when you do, you’ll notice how some or most of your expectations don’t match up to who they really are. In turn, you become disappointed. More specifically, it may come easily to feel that way even when the small details just don’t match with you.

8 You invest a lot in the relationship.

A healthy relationship is when both partners are equal in giving their time and affection. Even if time passes and energy levels can fluctuate (e.g., 80/20 as long as it’s been discussed), there’s still a fine line that shouldn’t be crossed. In other words, it’s likely for hopeless romantics to give more than what they’re getting in return. Sure, they can act that way when it’s the starting stage of a relationship, but it’s questionable when the relationship progresses.

In line with this, you may allow one-sided relationships to happen, wherein your partner takes the backseat and barely gives you any attention like you do.

9 You believe that your ideal love story will complete you.

Honey, there’s more to life than just love. It’s just an aspect of it.

Some hopeless romantics only feel truly successful in their lives once they match with their own and only. Like that’s their endgame and their life is finally complete and fulfilling. But then again, many other factors make life feel more purposeful, and love shouldn’t be the only thing that truly matters.

10 You ignore potential warning or red flags.

Some hopeless romantics may not realize that they’re wearing rose-colored glasses when they get into a relationship. Such warnings or red flags don’t matter to them if their partner has all the traits they’re looking for. They’re fully in deep with the idea that they’re the one for them as they don’t want their fairytale to end in heartbreak. But love, staying with someone who exhibits red flags in the long run is much worse. 

So please, take a step back and truly evaluate them with all the good and bad. And if the bad triumphs, you know what you need to do.

How to Be a Responsible Hopeless Romantic

Refer to this list of tips when you identify as a hopeless romantic and want to ensure healthy behavior surrounding it.

1 Acknowledge and understand your tendencies.

Being a hopeless romantic is not necessarily a bad thing. It just means that when you love, you love deeply, and you see so much beauty in the idea of love. However, it is key to evaluate your behavior towards love. 

Some things worth reflecting on include:

1. Your patterns on romantic love: Do you fall in love fast? Are you eager to jump from one relationship to another? Are you attached to fantasy more than reality? Do you ignore or pay close attention to red flags? Do you really like them or the idea of them? Are you aware on whether or not you’re getting love-bombed?
2. Where your standards on love came from (media, childhood, real-life relationships, etc.)

Upon reflecting, give yourself grace and accept your feelings as they are. But stay keen on how these factors can affect your choices and decisions in love. Self-awareness can go a long way here!

2 Build a strong foundation of self-worth.

Romantic love shouldn’t validate or define your self-worth. You’re already whole regardless of the presence of such love. In turn, it’s all about how you view your life in the current moment that matters.

With that in mind, some building blocks that lift up your self-worth would be:

1. Prioritizing self-care
2. Learning to enjoy your own company
3. Cultivating your current friendships and creating new ones
4. Setting time for your hobbies and/or trying new things
5. Getting to know yourself better and your strengths

3 Set realistic expectations.

This tip is what filters the responsible, hopeless romantics from the not-so-responsible ones. When your standards in love are unattainable, then it appears you’re hopeless in finding love, even more so when you nitpick everything.

In other words, you must stay grounded as you venture through finding love. Whether intentional or not; you never know when the one waltzes into your life and changes everything. 

But even with that potential scenario, real, healthy relationships are built and worked on day by day. They’re also a lot more complex than just falling in love, and it doesn’t automatically guarantee a happily ever after. You need to know what your relationship deal breakers and non-negotiables are in order to get into the right relationship.

Moreover, remember that people are imperfect, so don’t expect them to act like a fairytale character. Mind you, you will also have your equal share of imperfections along the way. Most importantly, you should take your time with each other. Enjoy the slowburn of things, wherein your connection deepens at its own pace rather than sparking all at once then fades out just as quickly.

4 Build healthy boundaries.

As a hopeless romantic, the lines from realistic standards to fantasy can get blurry easily. Hence, setting boundaries is key to protecting you from harm. Thus, take time to evaluate your personal boundaries and then respectfully communicate them with your partner so they don’t cross them. Make time for your own space and individuality too. 

At the same time, remember not to overextend yourself to “prove” your worth to them and recognize any red flags that come up. Rose-colored glasses, who? We don’t know them — just total self-respect when you stand up for yourself and even walk away from relationships that don’t serve you well.

5 Seek professional help.

Upon exploring these various solutions above, it’s still possible for some to fall into cycles of heartbreak and toxic relationships. Deeper issues such as codependency and having an anxious attachment style may lead to this happening. Whether you resonate with the latter issues or not, seeking professional help from a therapist can help better pinpoint the root problem and any underlying patterns.

Alongside that, they aid in reframing your views and beliefs in love and relationships and healing any inner wounds from past experiences. In other words, they won’t take away your romanticism; they’re rooting it in reality. It provides a stronger groundwork for intimacy and love.

Takeaway

Being a hopeless romantic is a beautiful thing as long as it’s paired with self-awareness and a strong sense of self-worth. You can have a deep sense of love without staying out of touch with reality. As long as you set proper boundaries, stay cautious of warning or red flags, and manage your expectations, hopeless romantics can be in and experience healthy and fulfilling relationships. True romance thrives best when it’s healthy, heartfelt, and balanced.

For more love-related guides such as this one, head on over to the Lauvblog here.