Disclaimer: This article is written specifically about consensual exhibitionism. We do not promote non-consensual exhibitionism or people with exhibitionistic disorders. If you have the symptoms of Exhibitionistic Disorder DSM-5 302.4 (F 65.3), please seek help from a mental health professional immediately.
Do you like the feeling of getting exposed while doing sexual acts? Are you aroused by the thought of showing your genitals to your partner? Are you tempted to take nudes or videos of yourself while masturbating? Chances are, you have an exhibitionism kink.
Exhibitionism is commonly known as a paraphilic disorder, alongside sexual sadism disorder, voyeuristic disorder, and others. It’s also a common notion that people interested in this kink will engage in illicit acts such as showing their genitals to non-consenting individuals (flashing).
However, not all people interested in exhibitionism will engage in flashing and other related acts. There’s a type of exhibitionism called “consensual exhibitionism,” in which the exhibitionist only partakes in this kink with like-minded individuals who’ve given them informed consent.
If you want to try consensual exhibitionism or are simply interested in the topic, you came to the right place. This article will discuss consensual exhibitionism, particularly fun and safe ideas you could try when exploring this kink.
What is Exhibitionism?
Exhibitionism is when an individual gets aroused by flashing their genitals to someone or being seen by others when engaging in sexual activities.
As for people with the exhibitionistic disorder, most of them feel sexual gratification from their victims’ disgusted or shocked faces.
Types of Exhibitionism
As we’ve mentioned earlier, not all exhibitionists are created equal. Below are two types of exhibitionism.
Consensual Exhibitionism – This type involves the exhibitionist exposing themselves to a consenting person, preferably a romantic or sexual partner. Ground rules are laid out, and everyone involved in the activity has given informed consent to one another.
Non-Consensual Exhibitionism (Exhibitionistic Disorder) – This type involves exhibitionists seeking non-consenting strangers and exposing their genitals to them. This can occur in person or online.
Why Some People Enjoy Consensual Exhibitionism
For people whose reaction is “hell no!” to this kink, you’re probably wondering why some people are enticed to expose their sexual selves. Below are some of the reasons why exhibitionists enjoy this kink.
1They get turned on by being the center of attention.
People who engage in consensual exhibitionism often do it because being the center of attention is incredibly arousing. Seeing people gaze at their bodies as they engage in an intimate act may enhance the pleasure they feel in the deed.
Some people also have that “pornstar” fantasy wherein they want to feel like they are part of an erotic film. But since it’s not doable for them to work in the pornography industry, they just engage in exhibitionism to satisfy that sensual fantasy.
2They love the reaction they get from their partners, boosting their confidence in the process.
Some people become exhibitionists to their partners because they want the feeling of being someone’s object of desire. They love the reaction that they get from their partner whenever they discreetly flash their genitals in public. They know their partner is getting all heated up from what they’ve just witnessed. It then increases their confidence and may even positively affect their body image.
3Their best sexual experiences involve exhibitionism.
Another reason why some people have this kink is that their best sexcapades may have involved exhibitionism. For instance, a woman may have ended up having sex in the hotel room’s terrace because her partner asked for it. The pleasure she experienced in that session was so intense that she may want to do it again and again.
4They love the thrill of getting caught.
Some people like exhibitionism because it adds some “spice” to the deed. Having sex in a place where there’s a possibility of being exposed may result in an adrenaline rush, making the sexcapade more exciting for some people.
5They simply enjoy performing and putting on a show.
Some people simply love taking center stage, even with their sexual activities. Exhibitionism helps unleash the performer in them, so even though exposing themselves is risky, they do it because it gives them that fulfillment.
Safe & Fun Ways to Engage in Consensual Exhibitionism
Want to try this kink but are unsure about how to start? We’ve got you covered, pal. We’ve listed the safe and sexy ways to engage in exhibitionism. Remember to ask for your partner’s informed consent before participating in these activities. Let’s get started!
1Send sensual photos or videos to your partner.
The best way to kickstart your exhibitionist journey is by sending sensual photos and videos to your partner. Just put on your hottest undergarments, or bare it all! You can go with boudoir poses or go candid; for example, send a recorded video of yourself while showering. It helps you fulfill that “being watched by someone” fantasy.
We also recommend sending it while your partner is at work or when they least expect sexy content for you. Just let them know you’ll be sending something sexy and wait for them to give consent before sharing those intimate photos and/or videos. A simple “Hey babe, I’ve got something naughty to send to you… Would you want to check it out now, or is it better to send the surprise later?” text can suffice.
Also, don’t forget to turn on the timed message or private mode on your messenger. It’s better to be safe than sorry; ensure the receiver can’t download or screenshot your photos and videos.
2Go commando during a date and secretly flash to your partner.
Another great activity for new exhibitionists is going commando during a date and showing off your genitals whenever possible. Wear a skirt, shorts, or any bottom garment that lets your genitals peek through if you do certain positions, such as bending over. Watch as your partner keeps their composure whenever they see your plump peach/bulge in your skirt or shorts.
This activity is also a good way to test the waters and see if your partner is interested in this kink. If they respond well to this activity, it could signify that they’re okay with other exhibitionist acts. However, if they feel iffy about you getting exposed in a public space, then there’s a chance that they’re not into this kink.
3Try public fun (But keep yourself out of trouble!)
Take your exhibitionism plays to the next level with public sex. As mentioned in the previous section, public or outdoor sex gives the deed a “thrilling” flavor. It also helps you fulfill the fantasy of being observed during a sexual act.
Remember to be discreet and avoid committing public indecency (grave scandal). For good measure, have public sex in places that aren’t guarded, such as your friend’s garage. There’s still the thrill of getting caught (by your friends), but you don’t necessarily wouldn’t get into much trouble compared to doing it in the public park, library, cinema, etc.
4Have sex in public/outdoor-themed motel rooms.
Do you want to experience public sex but don’t want to get into trouble? There are themed hotel rooms to help you with that. What’s great about themed rooms is that they provide an environment similar to public space but still give you that needed privacy to do your naughty business. For example, if you have the fantasy of getting buttf*cked in an MRT train, you can book a room with a train-themed room.
5Invite someone or a group of people to watch you do sexual acts.
Another great way to fulfill your exhibitionism fantasy is by inviting a couple of people to watch you have sex or masturbate. Depending on the setup, you can also involve them in other sexual activities. What’s great about this activity compared to public sex is that you can do this privately, and you’ll get all the attention you crave.
6Try mutual masturbation.
Another fun and private way to explore this kink is mutual masturbation. As the name implies, you and your partner will masturbate next to or in front of each other. What’s great about this one is not only you’ll get to be observed as you touch yourself, but orgasms are guaranteed since you already know the spots to touch and stimulate.
7Create an “alter” or erotic persona on social media.
An “alter” is a type of account in social media wherein the uploader is anonymous, and their account is only filled with lewd content. It’s safer than meeting a consenting stranger and letting them watch you do the deed.
However, there are a lot of creeps online, so you’ve got to be careful when connecting with someone. Ensure you also use burner emails and numbers to avoid exposing your identity.
8Have sex next to a window or balcony.
Another fun way to explore exhibitionism is by having sex in the terrace, balcony, or near a window. You’ll get to “expose” yourself but also avoid getting reprimanded for public indecency since you’re still doing it in a private space. However, be mindful of your surroundings as there’s a risk of being recorded in this activity.
9Shop for lingerie with your partner.
Want to show off your hot body and tease your partner in public? Go lingerie shopping with your partner. Try out the sexiest undergarments that you could find and invite your lover inside the fitting room.
If your partner is not allowed inside the fitting room, you can take photos and send them to your partner while they’re waiting outside. Or if they’re just right in front of the door, you can slightly open it and show off your body wearing that racy lingerie. Do what works for you without breaking the store rules.
10Create a homemade erotic video.
Another go-to activity that you can do to unleash the exhibitionist in you is by making a homemade sex tape. Just grab your camera and tripod and record the deed! What’s great about this kinky activity is that you’ll get the feeling of being watched over but not exposing yourself to other people (unless you decide to share the erotic video with others). You can also save it as a remembrance but be careful with storing it; make sure it’s secure.
11Try exhibitionism-related roleplaying scenarios.
Roleplaying can do wonders when it comes to this kink, as you can create scenarios related to exhibitionism.
For example, you can ask your partner to be the owner, and you’ll be the sexy maid. The scenario would be like this: You started masturbating in the maid’s quarters but forgot to unlock the door. The owner then slightly opens the door to ask about something and finds you doing the deed, but instead of speaking up, the owner will just “secretly” watch what you’re doing. You can sense that the owner is just on the other end of the door, so you start masturbating in wilder positions. You can proceed with having sex after a few minutes, once the owner can’t hold their desire anymore.
12Join a sex party!
If you wanna go all out, try connecting with sex clubs or swingers groups in your area. Sometimes, these people organize sex parties wherein people can watch other couples have sex. Once you and your partner get an invite, discuss ground rules beforehand to prevent conflicts about switching partners, doing certain sexual activities, etc.
Frequently Asked Questions
Still got questions about exhibitionism? Don’t worry, as we’ve answered some of the frequently asked questions below.
1What’s the difference between voyeurism and exhibitionism?
Voyeurism is a kink wherein a person derives pleasure from seeing other people engage in sexual activity. On the other hand, exhibitionism is when a person gets sexually satisfied when they’re being watched while doing a sexual act. They’re opposed to one another but are related because an exhibitionist usually seeks help from a voyeur to fulfill their fantasy and vice versa.
2What’s the difference between exhibitionism and candaulism?
As mentioned above, exhibitionism is a kink wherein a person gets aroused or sexual gratification from being seen while engaging in sexual acts. Meanwhile, candaulism is a kink wherein people derive pleasure from exposing their partners’ sensual side to other people.
3What are the tips we should remember when engaging in this kink?
First things first, always ask consent from your partner before the deed. If you plan to have sexual acts in public, be discreet and avoid crowded areas or guarded spaces. Also, remember that this activity comes with a risk as someone might record you, or someone might hack into your personal devices and expose your sensual photos online. Be extra careful.
4How should I tell my partner that I’m interested in exhibitionism?
We don’t personally know your partner, so we can’t give a concrete answer to this question. We recommend sharing this guide and asking them your thoughts about this kink. Are they interested in it? Disgusted? Confused? Let this article be your starting point in the discussion.
5What are the best types of sex toys for this kink?
If you’re planning to do public fun, we suggest using app-controlled wearable toys such as lay-on vibrators, love eggs, vibrating cock rings, and anal vibrators. Wear them and then give full control to your partner. Enjoy the unpredictable yet pleasurable experience!
And there you have it, we’ve laid down everything you need to know about exhibitionism. We hope this guide has helped you get started with this kink and unleash the wild exhibitionist in you.
As mentioned a couple of times in this article, be careful with dealing with strangers when engaging in this kink, as there’s a risk of getting your intimate photos or videos exposed. For more kinky guides, click here for other articles. Good luck!